I had this moment last night
where I did what I always do—panicked over a situation I created.
Worried previously I wouldn’t get any work—-now I’m toying with the decision of getting two job offers. Mind you, these jobs have not even been offered to me yet. However, I had myself so worked up I was already going over a Pros and Cons list in my head for each at 1:30 in the morning.
I finally stopped before the anxiety won. I thought, this isn’t even happening. I just made this situation out of thin air. I’m not preparing for what’s to happen, I’m making it up and worrying myself over it.
If I get the one offer—amazing. If I get the other, I’ll think it over carefully. I’m keeping in mind, also, the last time I made a decision based on what I thought would make someone else happy ::cough::Junior yea of college when I dropped out of a NJ State school because I only went to make my mom happy::cough::
I have to hold my own happiness to a higher value. If it’s an internship and not a job, fine. It can be worked out. I’ve wanted to work for this company for years. I’ve applied there endlessly. I can’t turn it down if they offer it up. I would honestly rather be happy in a temporary position, than miserable in a full time one in a small town so far from where I live.
No stressing unless the situation is real.
